Queerspawn: children of queers… that simple, right? Probably not…
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about this term and what it means to others, what it means to us, and what it may mean to our daughter someday.
I think I first heard the term in college, but immediately associated it with a good friend from high school. He was raised by many parents and has turned into one of the greatest men I know. I think he embodies queerspawn in a way that I hope our daughter will someday. I remember one of the first times we hung out, he put on red high heals and danced around the room to a Tina Turner song. In retrospect, I don’t think this had anything to do with his own sexual identity or even gender identity, but embodied a sort of freedom and non-normative rolemodeling around gender/sexuality.
The reality of the world is that disenfranchised and oppressed groups create their own culture in order to survive and thrive. Queers have done the same. I think what I have learned from my friend is that he will always be a member of queer culture, regardless of who he dates or ends up with, because that is the culture within which he was raised.
As I think about our daughter’s future, I hope that she will always find a home in our queer family, our queer community, and the queer culture at large. I think that is what makes queerspawn.
I hope that this identity and connection to culture will help her deal with some of the harassment she will get for having two moms. I hope it will help her deal with her own gender and sexual development. I hope it gives her a lens through which to view the world that both acknowledges the realities of oppression and empowers her to create change.
See my friend’s amazing post about being thankful for turkey basters here.